I’ve confessed many times that I struggle with control and perfectionism and not necessarily in that order. I also know that almost 100% of the time, they’re simply excuses to not take action; plus I’m well aware that control and perfectionism are my default positions – my safety boat if you will. I’m also going to confess that taking action is not easy for anyone because our brains tells us not to, which leads to all kinds of resistance. So…I’m learning to be like water and flow.
Let’s face it…massive boulders and roadblocks show up in our lives and it’s always going to be that way. Perhaps you’re experiencing a time in your life when everything is working for you. You’re riding on top of the world and everything feels amazing. Of course in the back of your mind, you know a boulder is going to show up. Do you worry about it or do you enjoy the place you’re in right now?
Or maybe you’re struggling with life in general – money, time, overwhelm, a job that feels like a dead end; a boss who isn’t ideal; relationship issues; spiritual drifting; whatever it is, life is throwing you some curve balls. Do you push back and try to control everything? Do you wait it out?
Or do you allow yourself to be like water and flow? It’s difficult to learn to flow, but I promise you, once learned, it will change your life.
It sounds so simple, doesn’t it? Well, it is simple…but it’s not easy because it takes a complete mental makeover. When you run up against boulders, that is the exact time that your brain goes into overdrive and sabotages you! Your brain is not always your friend and it doesn’t like change one little bit. It much prefers to have you stay in your safety boat even if it no longer serves you. (Stop reading and think about that.)
Now think about why we are so mesmerized by watching the flow of water. It’s because it appears seamless…easy…organically simple. Water flows around and over the boulders, logs or any debris that gets in its way. Water always finds a way to flow.
What if you could learn to do the same? How would that change your life?
As a coach, I hear from clients how roadblocks stop them in their tracks. Roadblocks keep them up at night, whether it’s financial, personal, or relationships. They’re all roadblocks that cause us stress, fear and stagnation. Learning to flow is the key to moving past your boulders or roadblocks, because the truth is…there’s always a way when we choose to take action, flow and relinquish control.
Water is always in motion and when it isn’t, what happens? It becomes stagnant. It gets murky and polluted and this is exactly what happens to our lives when we stop moving forward.
The next time you’re faced with an obstacle, whether large or small, stop and regroup.
Take a few minutes to view your situation without emotion – from the place of distant observer.
Reach out and ask someone to support you in some way. Stop going it alone. We do better in community.
Take one small action towards overcoming your obstacle and do it within 5 seconds. If you wait, your brain wins and you’ll stop. Remember the 5 second rule.
Next, write out all the options you can think of to overcome your hurdle. You don’t have to have the final answer. You have to take action and flow.
If you want to really learn the strategy behind this concept and learn to flow, and you’re serious about changing this aspect of your life, I am now offering a Rescue Me Session which is 90 minutes via phone or Skype, plus two weeks of email support from me. You can schedule your time by going here.
Life is meant to be lived. We complicate it with our worries and fears and just downright goofiness. If we actually had a playback button to hear the things our brain tells us, we’d most likely laugh out loud, but we don’t, so we play the same tape over and over again expecting to get a new result.